SUN?DAY.

For the first time in Bates history, the attraction was closed due to snow (on Saturday).  Snow.  I believe if this evening were not the 2nd to last night and if it was not a weekend night, the farm would be closed.  Because let's just say, the farm was not in the best condition.

The employee parking lot was almost completely saturated and mucky, making it difficult to enter and leave at the end of the night.  The outside attractions were all seemingly a mess.  But I give the grounds crews credit, because they took care of what they could take care of and it seemed half A-O-KAY.  Probably A-O then.  But that still didn't stop from making our jobs a tad bit more difficult for the night.  And I forgot to mention the cold!  Boy howdy was it cold... I would definitely say it was the coldest it has ever been this season.  Maybe in the 30s.  And that makes for a hard times moving limbs and vibrating the vocal cords. 
Yet surprisingly, the frights were nice.  Due to the conditions, we were told to be careful and cautious with the customers and ourselves.  So when I would jump down at the wagon, I would just walk (as creepily as I could, of course) along side it, hoping to find some frightened individual.  I would also use the wagon a lot more tonight.  Grabbing the side and heaving myself up on it to amplify my voice over the wagon.  It was a subdued and easy-going night.  Even some odd characters on the wagons themselves!  There was a knight with epaules and red cape (must have been the medieval scene), there were a pletheroa of ugly face folk (some of which I weren't sure if they were actually wearing masks...), and even Thing 1 and Thing 2 complete with blue hair!  These characters gave me some good spirits for the rest of the night.

But then...
Right around 9:30PM (when ticket sales are supposed to close and we should be getting the heck out of there) is right when things started to oddly pick up.  The wagons coming were slow yet constant and still full of folks.  Well... I'll tell ya!  I never hated some strangers so much in my life!  Making me stay outside in these blistering temperatures.  Forcing me to entertain youse when all I want to do is steal the warmth right from your throats.  Are you really at a haunted hayride when it is 30 degrees out?!  And there's no source of warmth around?!  On a Sunday night?!  The night before Halloween?!  IT'S MISCHIEF NIGHT!  Go TP your neighbor's house or something!

Luckily, we weren't there for too much longer.  And I bring my sleeping bag on these brisk nights.  So I certainly had that on the pickup wagon.  And a snuggle buddy! ;)

(End of 22nd evening).

TGITLF.

Thank goodness it's the last Friday...

It was another early starting night.  I rushed out to my scene without even my overalls over my shoulders.  Yet I still had plenty of time at my scene.  Preemptive maneuvers for an anticipated busy night were to be unjustified by the night's activity.  Oh well!

It was the coldest evening we've had all season, I believe.  I certainly felt it too.  Whenever it's cold on the hayride, we, actors, tend to move around a bit more; to stay warm and to keep our mind off the temperatures.  This can be a good thing, yet the more you move around, the more you sweat.  And when it's cold outside, and there are no wagons around, this makes it all the much colder.  We have an option to either go crazy for the wagons when they come through to stay warm while risking getting colder on breaks or just get used to the cold and suffer through it.  So, pretty much, being out in the woods these nights is a lose/lose situation...

My friend came through tonight, though!  And I do believe I got him!  So that kept me alive for a little longer than I thought I would be tonight.  I also jumped up a lot on the wagon to talk to the entire peoples on the wagon.  It makes for a much more explosive performance.  Sometimes, I feel like I am starring in a miniature theater performance...

Yet, that machine mentality came into my head.  I can only change up my scene or my lines so much before it starts to get repetitive.  But when you find something that works well, and the higher-ups like it, it's hard to ever deter from that.  And I like to try to give every wagon the similar experience.  Obviously, if I find it's a wagon full of little monsters or douches, then that will change my mood, but for the most part, every wagon gets the same exact lines, same actions, and same scene.  That can really mess with your sanity.  Saying the same thing.  For 5 to 7 hours.  In the same spot.  Especially when they are lines about cannibalism or kidnapping people.

I'm not sure if it was a change of scenery this year or the vacancy of Phillies post-season baseball increasing patronage, but this season has tuckered me out much more than last season.  We still have two days left to go, yet I am already done.  I've been done since those busy nights, weeks ago.

It's time for me to get back to life of the living, rather than the life of the living dead!

(End of 21st evening).

We have work today?

It was our first Wednesday of the season... and also our last Wednesday of the season.  Due to the wet weather of the month, Bates has been closed the past two Wednesdays.  It felt odd to be there on this past evening.  Granted, the Wet Wednesdays were a nice break, but it certainly threw me off when I set foot on the farm.  Do I still get makeup or should I just sit there and look purdy?  Do I still act like a sick hick or should be a hospitable southern man?  Do I still speak in that twang or should I speak like an Australian?  Many confusing questions I had in my head, but turns out Wednesday is just like any other day.  Who knew?!

Also, tonight was the last night for our weekday saw-bed victim, Janet.  I will miss seeing her around the farm these next few days!  We had been singing wonderful Disney tunes in between wagons that sure got me through the past couple nights.

When you sacrifice your social life and your sanity for the sake of this job, the people you work with on these nights become your family.  They become the only people you truly converse with for the month because you're either sleeping or just too drained whenever you have contact with other human beings.  And what a family!  Any folk who work at a haunted attraction are a special breed, but I feel as if the ones at Bates are a very particular breed.  You could spend each evening talking to somebody new and still become fascinated or mesmerized by each one of their personalities and their lives.  And the whole experience of scaring folk every night for a month.  You learn things about people you would not normally learn about someone you just met a month ago.  You learn what makes them tick.  You learn what issues they have going on with them in their lives.  You learn about how they truly are.  The farm is an escape.  From your life at school.  From your work.  From your loved ones.  Even from any issues you have going on in your life.  For just one month, those issues get put on hold if you want them on hold.  Or the family takes care of them for you.  Either way, the farm is a nice getaway.

Anyways...

The night was yet another night at the sawmill for myself and Colin.  I believe I am pushing my feet a little too far.  My right foot is acting up and now I have a temporary zombie walk for a couple weeks to come.  This is all, of course, my fault because I don't pay heed to my body when I am in character.  The whole scare for my scene involves myself posing as a mannequin on a giant spool.  I jump, sometimes clicking my heels, laughing or barking like a dog, as my feet in my boots meet the dirt ground.  It has taken a toll most on my feet, my knees, and my back.  But no matter, I say, I'm young, I'll recover!  However, tonight, every jump was felt in the SOULS of my feet, as I would sometimes yelp at the patrons; not out for fright's sake, but for pain's sake.  Oh well!  November is for recovery.  It's still October!

Due to the closures of the Wet Wednesday, our family night and military appreciation night were rescheduled for this evening.  Tonight would call for a much more respectful and respectable crowd.  Tonight involved a lot of laughs.  Good-hearted laughs, if I may add.  I had a lot of enjoyment just conversing with the folk tonight.  In my hillbilly hootinany, of course!  There were a few scaredy cats on the back of the wagon tonight.  I'm not sure if I told you how Colin and I like to follow folks out of our scene, but we sure got some good screams and laughs tonight out of that.

Later in the evening, Colin's brothers came through.  We weren't entirely sure what wagon he'd be on, so we just had to keep an eye out.  We knew we couldn't really scare them on account of them being brothers and not a mother (moms are always easy to scare, yet I don't feel right scaring my mom...), so we tried for the whole let's-make-them-uncomfortable-and-create-a-show-out-of-it.  So a few wagons went by when I got word they were in the woods.  I jumped down and they were immediately there.  Perfect timing, maybe.  I grabbed on to the one.  And Colin snorted into the other's ears.  It's always rough scaring somebody you know.  If they have no idea where you are and what you do, it's easier, but if they do know that fact, then you have to get creative with the scares.  And the hayride is extremely difficult to get creative.

After that wagon went through, Colin and I both just wanted to be done, for it was past sell time.  And soon enough, we were.  The end to our first and last Wednesday of the season!

(End of 20th evening).

Terri-tiring.

It felt like any other Tuesday.  Slow, dull, and mediocre.  Nothing too exciting.  Nothing exciting ever happens on a Tuesday.  I mean, it's Tuesday.  Come on.  Yet it was the last Tuesday of the season!

It's bittersweet.  Bitter, for where else can you take all of the demons inside of you and use them for a job?!  Sweet, for it is an absolute drainer of your whole self and you cannot keep doing this for much longer.  I can remember the first night when Colin and I had NO IDEAR what to do for our scene and for some screams.  And the Weather Channel passing through.  Very awkward and very uncomfortable.  But this night, it was just another night at the job.  We had our frights down to a science.  And soon the experiment will be over!

But then.  It finally arrived.  The month's arduous work caught up with my essence and my being.  I had felt it all just dragging me down.  My scene mates were just having usual conversations about Disney movies and delectable food, but I could not partake because of the fatigue.  The fatigue of all the days before had finally gotten to me.  Every wagon was tougher to scare.  The only way to keep doing it was because I was used to it.  And for a Tuesday, it was tough.  There was a consistent activity of wagons coming on through.  But eventually, it ended.

ooo-wee.

(End of 19th evening).

Okay... Okay...

I showed up a wee early today to get latex on mah face!  Never had latex on before, so I figured what the HAY!  And I must say.  I do think Mike did a mighty fine job with the makeup tonight.

Another late start to an early night.  Super duper nice.  Especially after the long weekend and the strained beings of us all.  I was not entirely pumped up to scare tonight but then I recalled that all of my parents were coming!  I wasn't sure if my primary parents were coming, but I knew my other parents were...

So the first wagon rolled through.  Scared some folks.  Made others laugh.  Then, the next one came through.  Repeat.  Except Colin came over to me after this one had passed and said, "I think I scared your mom."  And by the time he informed, they had already passed on through.  Aw shucks!  This made me want to get my other parents in some way or form.  (My other parents = Colin's parents).  The next wagon came.  Repeat.  Colin came over to me and said, "My parents are on that wagon!"  So we chased them down and hopefully got MA-MUH.  And then the next one came through.  Repeat.  Colin comes over again and says, "Joe is on that one!"  So, we chase them down again!

By the time those three wagons came through, surges of energy had just coursed through my whole entire body that the rest of the night seemed to go so smoothly.  Even though my knee was a bum.  And my voice was lost.  I said to myself, "alright... okay... this isn't so bad anymore."  I even had a lot of energy to just start punching stuff!  I enclosed my hand in a fist and punched a mannequin right near my spot.  Except I forgot it was hard plastic.  But surprisingly, I didn't feel anything!  WOOHOO FOR CRAZIES.

So the night went on a little longer, but ended soon enough.  I got in a lot people's faces tonight on account of the whole not-having-a-voice-so-have-to-converse-face-to-face-with-the-folk thing.  Those three early wagons were pretty much the highlight of the night.  I feel absolutely drained.  Yet I've learned to deal with it and am just happy to be scaring peoples!

(End of 18th evening).

We have to do this again?!

I arrived at the farm at approximately 5:15 in the evenin'.  I was completely feeling last night, yet I was somehow rejuvinated.  Maybe it was just the camaraderie of everyone and our understanding of each other's well-being (or not-so-well-being).  Or maybe it is that farm's damn magical revival powers.  Who knows?  At least when I arrived I felt half somewhat okay decent, yup.

But then, we got to our scene.  It was already pretty nippy.  And my voice had not recovered whatsoever.  And then I realized we had to do what we did last night all over again.  And I just got so put off.  I realized the night was not going to be that enjoyable at all.  And I felt sorry for the customers because I just could not do my usual nonsense by putting on a decent show for them.

At first, it seemed like it was going to be a relatively simple night.  The wagons came through with breaks in between.  There was not a steady pace of the busy bodies yet.  We didn't start in the daylight.  It was already an hour later when we started the night before.  All is well, right?

Not right.

It started to pick up when we had nothing left in our essence.  Hillary had absolutely no voice to scream.  Colin had no energy to crawl around.  And I had no knee to skip nor any voice to be hyper hillbilly.  Just not good.

When the last wagons were coming through Hillary (the victim for the night and famous celebrity) and I both reached our own stages of delirium.  There was one time when we just both started laughing as a wagon was coming around the corner and we were getting ready.  Then we just started blabbering away.  I cannot even remember what we were saying, but it was definitely not English at some points.  I even had a customer ask me, "Man, what are you saying?"

I hope this week is super duper easy cos I'm spent, my dear!

(End of 17th evening).

Can't even... Not even try... Ow...

If last Saturday was any sign of how this evening would go, we knew we were in for a rough evening.  And boy, what a crazy evening.

We were in our scene and scaring the first wagon at 6:20PM.  Typically, we would not even be in our scene then, for it would still be light out.  We were scaring people when the sun was just still faintly awake.  And that was odd.  Being able to see people's faces.  And them seeing mine.  It made for a very awkward first few scares.  But sooner than later it got dark again and we were back to the whole creepy, dark backwoods.  Ah, how comforting!

Half way through the night, a manager came by and told us that they were going to start sending wagons through every 90 seconds.  He told us to take it easy and save our breath.  I believe Colin and I were too tired to even bitch or complain.  We just had to accept the fact and that was that.

The woods were certainly cursed tonight.  A customer was hurt pretty bad.  A tractor malfunctioned in a scene making for a steady train of 4 or 5 wagons.  A few customers jumped off the wagon and into the woods.  Maybe that last one was another night.  Anyways, the night was just not the best for hayride folk.  Especially for few actors in particular.  Because this all happened in one scene.  The medieval scene!  I guess that's what sorcery and the plague will give you.

It felt like we were machines.  Or as our one coworker, Emily, described it, like ghosts.  She said it would suck to be a ghost because that's basically what we are.  And I had never thought about it like that before, but we very much are like residual spirits.  Destined to haunt a particular location when visitors come and bother our shtuff.  So yes, it would suck to be a ghost.

At around 11 o'clock in the evening or so is right about when I lost it.  "It" entailing everything I possessed.  My physical possessions such as my voice, my legs, my back, my hands, just my entire body was yelling at me for some relief.  My mental sanity certainly drove off.  I would stand upon my spool, swaying from left to right, muttering something, not even sure what I was muttering, no hint of a smile on my face, eyes crazy with the intent of "up-to-no-good".  My acting became reality.  I became the insane hick, living in the sawmill.  I could not do my hillbilly yelp, so my voice would just be yelling.  HOLLERING.  Like a damned fool!  I had a lot of people look back at me because my speech mannerisms were not exactly right.  Not that I was not saying the right lines.  The way I was saying them became very odd.  Loud as possible.  I'm not sure if it was scary, but maybe more an unnerving factor.  The only thing that kept me through the night was a comment my buddy Colin made about our work in June (overnight flooring work in department stores).  He said, "Well, at least we won't be here when the sun comes up."  That's about the only thing that kept me from getting a little too nuts with any customers in the hopes that I could leave.

This was the busiest night the Bates Motel & Haunted Hayride has ever had, at least for the hayride attraction.  It's nice to be a part of that history, but it wears on our already weak human structure.  And it will take all week to recover.

(End of 16th evening).

That wasn't too bad...

We were told the day before to arrive a half hour earlier than our allotted call times.  The ambiance on the farm was of a dreaded anticipation.  The anticipation for the long weekend ahead.

Even with the lingering feeling of "oh boy", we didn't want to let up.  It was a good night for scares.  Colin and I killed it tonight.  And maybe a few people as well.  We perfected our stalking of the wagon really well.  Every wagon that came through was pretty much followed until the wagon reached the next scene.  I'd say it was a good night.

For some reasons, the Friday evenings have all let out relatively early (knock on wood, still one more Friday...). You would think Fridays and Saturdays would be the equally busiest nights, but Saturdays are significantly busier than Friday.  I spose folk don't like to venture out to a farm after work!

By the end of the night, we had realized we may have done a little too much.  For the next two days would be torture.

(End of 15th evening).

Thursday?

So, honestly, I do not remember that much from Thursday.  It is Monday today and I had 3 days in between Thursday and Monday to take the place of those Thursday memories.

I believe it was a night like any other night of fright.  Screams.  Laughter.  

The night was not that long.  I recall it ending semi decent for a Thursday evening, in which ticket sales close at 10:30PM.

My apologies for such a lame post, but this weekend was rough.

P.S.  I think this might be my favorite makeup of the season.  Or at least one of my favorite makeups of the season.  There's too many to choose from!

(End of 14th evening).

Forecast: Oh sh*t

Hey!  So...

This weekend is going to be super duper busy.  And I do not know when I will have time to write some entries.  So I will see what I can do when I can do it!

I just wanna go home :(

Today was just one of those days where it seems everything is not going.  Just, you know, not going.

Before Bates tonight, my car got towed.  I missed a midterm.  I sliced the nail on my strumming finger, making it painful to play my Esmeralda.  I attempted to nap, but nope.  I ate a ham and cheese sandwich.  It wasn't a very good ham and cheese sandwich.  Needless to say (I'm going to say it anyways), I just wanted to go home when I returned to the farm tonight.

Tonight was the night when the actors get to go through each other's scenes.  How nerve-wracking is that?!  Having your co-workers all come see you do a job that they could have been doing, or doing better, for that matter.  And I tend to over-think and let my nerves get the better of me in pressure situations, but some times, not.  This happened to be one of those refreshing not situations.  I think I did pretty well considering I got some applause from the full wagon of house actors.  But I think I went too hard because the rest of the night had me dragging like a ghetto teenager's over-sized basketball shoe feet.

Injury report:  My IT band is acting up again.  It is not painful, but it does put a damper on things.  And well, it actually is a little painful.  I just need insoles, but I don't want to bother.  So I'll need to wrap my knee up tomorrow evening!  The joys of being a haunted attraction actor ;)

I do enjoy the company and camaraderie of this place.  The day started off with an exhaustion of just everything, yet I came to Bates, and I was just exhausted with some things.  I am pretty damn sure this farm has magical powers that heal any sort of odd ailments you may have JUST so you can get through the night's work.

(End of 13th evening).

Done already?

Tonight was quick, yet not so painless. 

Just like this post.

(End of 12th evening).

Battered & Bruised.

I never realized how draining a night can be.  When I pulled up to the farm today, I was not looking forward to the night, at all.  I kept telling myself, this is an awesome job that only lasts for a month, so make the most of it.  When I got my makeup on, I took a squat on some rocks and just sat there for 20 minutes, eating sunflower seeds.  Not talking to anyone.  Attempting to stay warm and relaxed.  Searching for any sort of motivation or deep reserve energy or at least, some sanity.

The first wagons came through around 7PM.  Tonight, we kept tabs on the time.  We were told that ticket sales would close at 9:30PM.  It was a counting down night.  Cos after those first few wagons, last night caught up with me and left me for dead.

Sundays tend to be family fun nights.  Sometimes you get awesome families with wonderful children and joyous parents.  Sometimes you get those families with blissfully ignorant parents and their "kids".  It's a luck of the draw.  But with the way the night before went, I just was not up for any difficult folk tonight.  What is ironic is that the night before, I was decent with the incredibly annoying monsters on the wagons, yet I couldn't handle any sort of sass tonight, not even the little things.

I would say things that made no sense at all, whatsoever, not even in the slightest.  I tend to ask the wagon, "YALL WANNA STAY FER DINNUR?!"  And then sometimes I get a response asking me what we're having.  And I usually respond with, "WE'RE HAVIN' LAYYYY-EGGGGS (legs)"  But one normal customer asked me what we were having tonight and I told him, "WE'RE HAVIN' DEEP FRIED, SMOTHERED IN BARBECUE SAUCE HUMAN LEGS!"

O_O

WHAT?! What does that even mean?  Why did my mouth say that and my mind was okay with it?  I'm pretty sure you can't even smother deep fried human legs in barbecue sauce, so I think I scared the customer not with fear, but with just a general well-being for human sanity.

Around 9:45PM, we had a significant break.  Yet it was complete silence.  None of us conversed with one another.  We all hit a stage of exhaustion and delirium beyond recovery and repair.  Colin would be completely sprawled on the ground.  Hillary would be flirting in and out of consciousness.  And I was using my fake leg as a cuddling partner.  It was rough.

P.S.  DO YOU LIKE MY HAT?! My awesome friend, Rose, made it for me.  She also works at Bates, but in the corn maze.  She's a doll!

(End of 11th evening).

A HARD DAY'S NIGHT

Anticipation for tonight was already exhausting.  Everyone knew it was going to be a long night.  And when I say a long night, I mean every sense of the word long.  Long being continuously the same feeling the entire night.  That feeling of exhaustion.  That feeling of insanity.  That feeling of death.  And it only lived up to the expectations.

We started the earliest we have this season. My makeup was even rushed.  Not that it was bad.  There's something nice about the conversations you have with an artist as they are painting a painting on your face.  And I actually think my makeup has been great the past two nights.  It's great every night!  Yet I just felt like a rushed cattle being herded back into my fenced area.  When we eventually got to our scene, our work would not be over for the next 7 hours.

Colin wanted to rearrange his section because it was getting to be terrible to deal with all night long.  From the beginning of the night, we were working hard.  And when the first wagon came through tonight, we decided we wanted to know how many wagons we would have during the course of the night.  NOT so we could judge when we would be leaving, BUT to see if it would be a record-breaking night.  Believe me I'm not someone who is counting down to get out of there.  I feel you should not really be complaining about working at a haunted attraction.  It is for a month.  And it is your choice to work there.  Exceptions include nights like tonight when it is absolutely exhausting, but continuous complaints are pointless.  I just do not.  Nevermind!  I'm complaining about complaining.  How silly...

At about an hour in, I decided to get back on the spot where I had my fatal fall the night before.  I got one wagon in and then a manager came through.  He immediately saw me and said, "Hey, what are you doing up there?!  If you fall, we got a load of trouble!"  At that statement, my scene-mates and I just looked at each other and smiled.  You see, I did not tell any higher-ups about my incident.  I didn't want them worrying about any liabilities.  And it was my choice to get on up there and take those risks.  Not their responsibility whatsoever, but I spose they're right.

So with that request, I stuck to my original, back-bending, body-aching spot.  For the next five hours.  I had to change it up a bit.  So I just went crazier with everything.  Stepping up my vocals and stepping up my energy.  For the night was going to be a busy one and I wanted to make sure I could handle it.

Every night, the first dozen or so wagons are a-o-kay.  No complaints, no problems.  People are generally in a good mood and want to be there.  They want to be scared or entertained.  They are not difficult about how you are performing, they are just enjoying the show.  But I have found that as the night progresses, the mood lessens.  The moon brings out the were-holes.  Usually, it is the young folk.  From the ages of elementary school to middle school.  I love kids.  But these are not kids.  As soon as you expose yourself to the wagon and they see you, they do not shut up nor even give you any kind of opportunity to have a witty comeback (which I might add I have been getting better and better at, making me proud of myself, for I have trouble talking in general).  So these "kids" just throw hay at you, yell incoherent and inconceivable statements, swing their wee arms, and hope that you give them all your much desired attention.  Well no thank you, "kid", but thanks for the 40 bucks!

I drank an energy drink around 11PM.  One thing you should know about me.  I don't normally drink energy drinks.  They make me crazy.  I'm already all over the place without them.  So when I drink a few sips.  It drove me over the edge.  My scene-mates were exhausted, yet I gained so much energy.  And that's when I started stalking the wagon all the way to the next scene.  Going from bouncy, silly hillbilly to creepy, crawly hick.

This was when things got a little crazy.  My mental state changed drastically.  My body was tired, but my mind did not know it, so I still give it my all to every wagon that came through.  Even though those kid creatures were gone, we had a new problem to deal with:  A-HOLES.  For some reason, there are grown-ass people who think certain things are funny when they are not, at all.  For example, there was a 40 year-old mother holding her hand out for high-fives.  I'M NOT GIVING YOU A HIGH FIVE.  I'M HERE TO MAKE YOU CRY.  On one particular wagon, there was an apparent 30 year-old a-hole.  Colin had come back after scaring the wagon with his patented pig snort and told us that there was this 30 year-old dude that just motioned his palm in front of his mouth, saying, "Oh, yawn."  Honestly, I have not seen Colin as pissed off as he was at the moment.  And he had every right to be.  What kind of human being does that?  What kind of response would you like to see from that?  HUH?!  If you think our attraction is dull, then keep it to yourself until you are completely done the entire attraction.  You have to understand that you are at a haunted attraction at 1 o'clock in the morning which has been open and in operation since 6:30 in the evening.  We are wiped.  You should have come sooner.  Technically, you shouldn't have even been allowed in because ticket sales were supposed to end at 10:30, but our owner is gracious enough to let you in.

I just have a few words to say to those a-holes who make our job just a tad bit unnecessarily difficult:


FUCK YALL. FUCK YALL. FUCK YALL.

I feel those words sum up the shared thoughts and emotions of the actors towards any hostile buffoons at the end of the night.  I did not keep up with the time much tonight because of how much activity we had.  The time did not matter tonight because we ended around 1:30 in the mornin'.  Oh, it's been a hard day's night and I've been workin' like a dog.  It's been a hard day's night and I should be sleeping like a log.

(End of 10th evening).

Good-hearted fun.

The weather was super funky today.  I was not sure if we would be working tonight as well, so I entrusted my inquiries with the weather folk.  Never trust your inquiries with the weather folk; their job is a glorified fortune teller.  Sometimes, they can be spot on, but other times, they are completely off.  This was one of those off days.  The forecast was to be thunderstorms for the better part of the day, yet when I looked outside all I saw was blue skies.  There were two instances when it was downpour, but it went right back to those beautiful skies.  When I arrived to the farm, I was already confused by this whole weather dilemma that I didn't know how the night would go at all!

I do enjoy working here at Bates because there are a vast amount of interesting folk.  Everyone has their own stories.  And everyone is their own person.  There are no two similar persons.  Although, the one night, the one make-up guy asked if I was friends with Colin because he said we have the same mannerisms, so I spose Colin and I are alike in that sense.  But everyone is very unique in their own way and that's what makes this place great.

The Travel Channel came tonight.  Hopefully, I will make an appearance, but you can never tell.  They go through every attraction multiple times, so they have tons of footage to work with for a 5-7 minute segment on a 46 minute long program.  And I'm not entirely sure my part is vital enough for those 5 to 7 minutes.  Oh well.  It was fun being a part of the making of it!

Our scene can either go two ways:  really swell or really awkward.  People do not expect us to come out from where we are.  That usually goes swimmingly swell!  However, it all depends on the mood of the folks on the wagon when we get up to their faces.  If they're into it or at least well-rounded people, then no worries!  But if they are no-good, cynical a-holes, then it is super awkward.  And I don't like to let up on my schpeel.  So it just makes for an all the more uncomfortable scene.  And I feel part of that happened when the Travel Channel came through, at least the last time.

I fell tonight!  (Again).  Except this time, it was a little worse.  I didn't just trip over my foot.  In my scene, a live actor is getting cut in half by a saw.  So she is laying on a bed that is situated on a 8-ft or 9-ft frame.  That night, I would sit on top of it, hollering down at the folks and at the girl being cut up.  It was all really great.  I think I really got into some people's heads.  BUT the one time, I wanted to jump down and chase the wagon out of our scene.  I stood up.  And I wear steel-toed boots with big laces.  So I am about to bend my knees to jump down.  And as I am in the air, I realize something is not right.  My lace got caught on a bolt on the top of the frame and wouldn't let go.  I fell directly to the ground, breaking that lace and eating dirt.  Apparently, the whole wagon witnessed the event because Colin came back telling me everyone was asking, "did you see that kid fall?"  The odd thing is I was completely fine.  A little loopy from the event itself, more the experience of it than physical harm, but otherwise, all good!

Hey, remember when I told you that strange things happen in the woods?  Well, our thoughts were confirmed tonight.  There are animatronics in the beginning of our scene that SHOULD go off when the wagon triggers the motion sensor, yet the animatronics only go off when the scene after us has their animatronics go off.  When we told the managers about this, they were a little baffled.  The animatronics are not wired to work that way at all and they were a little confused at how that even happened.  Another point in the night, we witnessed someone with a light walk into our scene.  They had triggered the sensor.  Setting our scene off.  And we were all a little confused.  But a wagon was coming around the corner, so we had to set up.  Colin walked over to his spot and heard a voice say, "Perhaps it was me."

It was just Rob.  That creepy crawler!  But I swear, there are some really odd occurrences in the night in these here woods!

Tonight went super duper quick.  And it was incredibly good.  My heart was back to normal.  My voice had just enough twang.  My material made much more sense.  It was just good.  And we were out by 11:30PM - 12:00AM.  A very relaxing Friday evening.

(End of 9th evening).

Dead.

It was a dead night.  (No pun intended).  I was not even sure if we would be open tonight, due to last night's preemptive closure.  I would say they made the right decision though, the higher-ups.  And as they should!  It turned out to be a drier than wet night.  Yet no one came.

Another late start to the night.  I'm telling you, these easy nights are becoming a bit of a habit and this weekend is gonna git me!  I could see the parking lot before heading out on my trek into the woods.  There were absolutely no cars in sight.  For a few minutes, I thought we might be heading right out to our scene only to be turned away.  But nope.  Instead, I was greeted with an overwhelming cloud of fog, encompassing our entire scene.  Apparently, the weather had made the animatronics go awry and never go off, leaving the fog machine to continuously spew out nasty fuss.  It was easily fixed, but it did leave for a very ominous image.  Just imagine.  You're in a sawmill.  It is slightly wet with a chill.  It is dark, but not supposed to be this dark, but you're in the woods, so it's even darker than that dark.  You're surrounded by mist.  It's neither warm or chilly.  It is just there.  A cart drives up, beams its headlights into your eyes.  And all you can see are legs, dangling from the rafters of the building.  It was a pretty insane moment.

I think tonight most certainly felt like one of those "just another day at the job" kind of nights.  I was not amped up for the first few wagons, not even throughout the entire night either.  There's a mine shaft scene we have to walk through to get our scene.  One of the first nights of work, Colin described it as if we were heading off to work through the coal mines.  But that is exactly how it felt last night.  Dragging my steel-toed boots, with a bag on my back, my body sore from the anticipation of the nights to come and a mind fried enough that it tastes like chicken.  Mhm, I reckoned this night would be another notch in the belt.

I forgot to mention that the higher-ups warned us not to take it all out tonight as well, due to the conditions of the trail and the wagons.  So even if I somehow mustered up enough mustard to scare, I could not expend it all out.  So when a wagon came through, I did my normal routine and went back to my scene.  Nothing more, nothing less.  And I always want more, unless my being is begging for the less.

The weather just played tricks on everyone tonight.  It has been the whole week.  From hot to cold.  From dry to wet.  From leaves of green to shades of autumn.  And the rain.  The rain has put a damper on life at the farm.  Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love the rain.  But it does make for slower nights and slower bites.  A tractor actually malfunctioned tonight, causing a delay in our performance.  Dragging the night on a bit more.  It feels as if with every drop that falls, my essence is just melting away.  I just wish I could appreciate the rain a bit more without the sensation of death creeping over my back.  And it is FALL! I want to see colorful leaves falling on the setting sun!  I want to feel a cool breeze, but not have to shiver under a cozy outfit!  I want to fucking skip around in the fucking woods with a mood reflective of the Earth's mood!  But I can't help but feel like the walking dead.


(End of 8th evening).

Fallin'

There is not much to report from tonight. It was more of a regrouping kind of night. Late start to an early night. We weren't situated at our scene until 7PM, when normally we would have scared the first wagon. And out by the end of sell time!

The wagons were good tonight and I was feeling much better. I still have aches about my body, but that is BOUND to happen. My heart is feeling much better, as is my mind. Sometimes you just have to take it easy, especially with the way the hayride works. Hayride scaring is much more different than house scaring. I use my voice more and more every time, which is good. I spent time perfecting my physical prowess last year and regaining it the first few days of the hayride, but now the issue is the voice. You can't just move around the wagon, you have to move your mouth as well. Multitasking! I've gotten really good at dropping in on the wagon at the right moment and I'm attempting to make better moments in the future.

I mentioned before that strange things happened in these woods before, right? Well, more of the same happened tonight. No girl running through our scene, but a constant rustling in the woods right by our scene. And not the typical rustling of a small woodland creature, but more noticeable. If you can hear rustling from where I am situated in the scene, then it is something notable. In one instance tonight, Colin heard some unmistakable heavy pitter-patter near him. Enough to have him move his bag so his stuff would not be messed.

Well, that was about as much excitement for tonight. Hey! It did finally felt like fall tonight. Leaves scattered across the street. A cool breeze through the car window as I sped down Dog Kennel Road, soaking in the atmosphere. Jeans and a long sleeve shirt fitting perfect with the weather. Now all I need is some pumpkin spice, a scary movie, and cozying up with a blanket.

(End of 7th evening).

Mellow Monday

Earlier this morning, I woke up with some heart issues. I had trouble breathing a little and I wasn't sure exactly how this happened. I'm assuming I exhausted my wee heart on Saturday night, and then over-killed it on Sunday night because that little guy was over-worked and under-paid for his duty. I spent the whole day nursing him back to health, up until I was at my scene. Indubitably, I told myself tonight was going to be an easy night. And I was to find out that it kind of had to be too.

As soon as I jumped down for the first wagon of the evenin' and started hollerin', I realized I did not have no voice to be hollerin' wid! Shoot! I would attempt to make my hick-ish yelps and yells, but to no avail, it all just came out a little short and made myself feel very silly. Usually, it would sound something like an OOOUUUUWEEEEEEEE, but it came out more like an OOOOUUwha. Yet I kept doing it. And now I have no voice. So, no voice and no heart. It kind of put me out of action for tonight. I will have to adjust myself for the next few days because I do need to recover.

We worked with a new victim tonight, and boy, she is good as well. I don't know how Bates attracts these damsels, but they do a bang-up job! Too bad it was a Monday though. It was the first Monday of the season and if it's a sign of how the rest of the Mondays are going to go, then I'm okay with that, because I could sure use an easy night after a hard weekend! And some time to do school work because I have a lot of that!

(End of 6th evening).

HOT DAMN.

This was my day before work tonight:

I woke up. Did a little homework. And came right back to the farm.

The night before left me sore, but I felt alive again when I returned. It was a hot one this evening, which was semi-nice, but semi-not so nice. We wouldn't have to worry about layering and that awful cold sweat feeling. But the slight humidity awoke the buggies. They ate our faces like Thanksgiving dinner! It actually, literally, truthfully was torture. Even more so due to the whole not-supposed-to-touch-your-made-up-face-or-else-it-will-smear-and-look-bad part. After 20 minutes, I just had to ignore the constant pinching or panging on my face, but it was bad. My scene-mates were feeling it too (so I wasn't going crazy... well, not yet, at least). We could just hope that it all would eventually go away. Luckily, it did!

When the first wagons came through, it was pretty nice and nice. Sundays are more family fun days, which is ideal after a hectic Friday & Saturday. The night seemed to be an easy-going one. And then the damn wagons kept on coming. So I tried some new things, involving my awesome co-worker, Hillary, but I'm not sure it worked as well, so I went back to the original material. But hey, let me tell you, this girl is pretty fucking great at her job and I'm proud to work with her because she has such a more difficult task than myself or Colin and she continuously does a superb job, rattling dem chains and hollering like a goddamn damsel in distress. So kudos to her!

In a few days' time, our rythym will have improved so much that it will be a whole story when you come through. It's a joy when you get to work with people's company you enjoy yourself, especially in this atmosphere, and we all play off each other really well. I've definitely realized that I cannot stand out as just a plain ole hillbilly, I have to take it up as more of an insane hillbilly, who skips around and hollers about having legs for dinner or how excited I am to see folk because I don't normally get to see folk out in the woods...

Later in the night, I started getting those mental twinges again. I got them last year when I would be really in the moment and maybe take things a little too far. I feel I would become some other person and it would take over my being; that's where all that energy comes from. The many people inside my head. Uh oh... crazy talk...

But it's back to school tomorrow for an 8AM class (which, by the way, I am totally unprepared for and wondering how I will be in the future), which makes me realize I am a human being with a human life and human activity. So maybe I can regain my sanity? Eventually... hopefully...

(End of 5th evening).

The first true test.

Before getting into my car this evening, I was already not sure how to feel about the night. Luckily, I put on some loud, screeching tunes and it pumped me up. The only thing that is going to get me through this month is adrenaline. And the camaraderie. And maybe energy drinks (Yerba Mate, to be exact).

I arrived a little early tonight (early for hayride folks) to help my buddy try to find his phone, which he lost the night before; it just disappeared while in his hat that was tucked away into a corner. Strange things happen in these woods and this will certainly not be the last time. But anyways, no luck on the phone.

The night began like any other. Fine and fun! No issues with any patrons, nor any issues with myself or my co-monsters. But then my bracelet broke. It was a bracelet a friend had made for me with my name and colorful beads. I had cherished it! But the wagon had gotten a hold of it and given it no mercy. The beads fell all over and I tried to regain whatever I could, but it will never be the same again. It upset me for the next few wagons coming through. I knew that this night was going to be a tough one. Just like that bracelet, the night would tear me to shreds when it was done with me.

Even with an exhausting night ahead of me, I did not let up. I hold myself at a very high level with almost everything I do. Most of the time, it isn't the smartest thing to do because I will have such high expectations that I will not even bother trying, for it is too much. However, with this gig, I do not like to let up at anytime. People come from far and far to see why this attraction is the best in the nation! And I don't want them to have a bad time, so therefore, I attempt to make sure at least a few folks have a good time on each wagon. If I'm not getting any screams, I definitely want some laughter, and I've gotten pretty good at that especially with my twangy voice and sassy comments.

I will admit though, it did get to be a lot to handle. And I must take measures next time to take better care of myself. It was especially a little much when we first looked at the time and it was only 8:30PM. Tickets stop selling at 10:30PM on a Saturday night. So we still had 2 hours plus the hours of the remaining customers, which turned out to be about an hour and a half. And we were already feeling it. It got to the point where any energy we had left was saved and used for the wagons. After a wagon came through, Colin and I would immediately collapse back in our scene after skipping and hollering just a few seconds before.

Besides the fatigue of the dragging night, there were some strange happenings. At one point, a lady with a hooded sweatshirt ran through our scene, but she ran from the end of our scene through to the beginning. I was too tired to holler out to her, but I knew something wasn't right. She ran through our scene and out of my field of vision, so I ran over to Colin to ask where she went. Colin told me she just ran straight into the woods, not the hayride trail. And she never came back. It was very odd, it was as if we had seen a ghost!

At the end of the night, every wagon that came through was just another test of our well-being; our physical state and our mental state. Whenever we would hear chainsaws, we would sigh in unison, out of frustration and exhaustion. The chainsaws are used by actors in a scene that is about 2 or 3 scenes ahead of ours. Sooner than later though, that last wagon came through (which we actually thought was the pick-up the actor wagon which made for a very awkward scare) and the night was over.

Well, not entirely, I still had to drive back to Philly that night. And decided to stop by the local bar for a relaxing conclusion to the chaotic night. And to top it all off, I slept with my make-up on, only to wake up 2 hours later to see a lot of dried "blood" on my sheets and pillow. Great. Not.

(End of 4th evening).

Aaaand we're back!

After opening weekend and a week off and a failed news story (Steve Jobs...), Bates is in the full swing of things. For the next 23 nights, the farm is my home. And even with an already battered and bruised body, I'm looking forward to spending my haunt season at Arasapha.

Due to the (about-a) week-long absence from the job, I thought I had lost touch with what I gathered from the opening days. And feared for the awkward to creep back. But nope. I lied. It did not. There was a definite not-so-comfortable factor at first, but with a few wagons under my belt, we got it back. Don't worry. We got it back.

I'm certainly becoming more comfortable with my character and my material and the scene, in general, so I reckon that's good, mhm! I conversed with a many a folk tonight. There's nothing like hearing a shriek from an unsuspecting patron, but it is also very rewarding just entertaining the folk. Having full fledged conversations about how they like human legs done over a fire or just flat out how they're doing. Last year, I learned that not every individual that walks through the attraction is frightened half to death. Nor are they even pleased to be there. And sometimes they take it even further by sassing your back! The nerve! (especially the children...) Some peoples' purposes for attending the attraction boggle my mind, but a lot boggles my mind, and so I just shake the plastic grid and hopefully get some new thoughts and fresh flesh. And before I know it, those disappointing busy bodies are gone like the common decency they never had. Oh and some words of advice if you're ever visiting an attraction of fear:

Do not try to scare the actors. It never works and you look like a tool.

Anyways, a-holes are a part of the job. Part of life. And the way you deal with them shows your character and improves upon it as well, both acting and living. And for every 20 ill-tempered victims, there is 1 just-the-right-amount-of-tude victim that makes my job worth it. I most certainly feed off these persons and their squeals, of fear or of humor. If you have ever seen Monsters, Inc., you will know what I'm talking about. Now that I think about, instead of solar energy or tidal energy or wind energy, we should be using scream energy, or laughter energy!

Well. Not too much happened tonight, so my scare-mate and I are cooking up some other interesting ideas for the rest of the season. And I'll give you a hint, it involves using our voices in other ways ;)

(End of 3rd evening).

F*** Steve Jobs.

Yesterday, I made a point to nap. For I knew the past 12 hours would be absurd, no matter how it turned out, so a nap was the best option. But I have trouble sleeping to begin with (I love sleep, I just don't do it that much), so napping is an even more difficult task. I napped. I wrote. I studied. I visited with a friend and ended up being at his house in South Philly until 3am, having to drive to the farm by 4am, but I still needed my costume which was located at my house in North Philly. Needless to say, I was running late. So I pushed ole Blu's heart as fast as it has ever gone before (Blu is my '94 Honda Accord), through the streets of Philadelphia to the back roads of Marple Newtown eventually to the farm, in an astounding 38 minutes. Upon arrival, I was informed that CBS was no longer coming due to the sudden death of Steve Jobs.

Frick.

It's not the farm's fault whatsoever. It's not even CBS's fault either. It's all Steve Job's fault.

Well, eff you Steve Jobs, you just had to die now, didn't you?

Calm before the storm

It is Wednesday, and I can see the madness on the horizon.

Bates was closed on Sunday due to rainfall. It was quite a nice surprise, yet completely understandable. The night before, the mud kept creeping up on our boots and wheels ever so much, to the point where it just got to be too much. And I suppose it never stopped. I'm not complaining though! I spent some much needed time with my family and doing a whole lot of nothing because boy, did I need that!

The first two days wiped me out. Gave me aches and sores in parts of my body that I did not even know I had used. The hayride is a much different environment than I was expecting. Well, at least much different than the house. And you might be saying, well, duh, Zack. One is inside and the other is outside. And I would say, yes, this is a true statement. But you never really grasp the whole concepts of the different sides until you experience one and then the other. The "in" is cozy and dry and more personal and forgiving. The "out" is rugged and wet and vast and unforgiving and a challenge that I will most heartily accept.

Anyways. Enough of the exhaustion talk; it is boring me.

HEY! GUESS WHAT?!

I will be on the news tomorrow morning (Thursday, October 6). CBS 3 is visiting the Bates Motel & Haunted Hayride tomorrow for their morning news program, and if you tune in, you might just see a familiar frightening face! If you're not an early riser, I will surely, and gladly, inform you of my 5 minutes of fame.

Until then, I must be off, doing things, for my life is not just some sadistic, yet entertaining spectacle for your eyes and your ears and your fears and your tears. Or maybe it is? One thing you should always remember, us monsters are people too ;)

Rain or whine.

One thing. No. One of the MANY things I love about this job is you can take any hostility, any aggression, any ill-tempered feeling you may possess from the day and turn it into motivation for the night's fright. Today was one of those days. Well, the day actually was not bad, quite relaxing even, had a bath! But right before the night began, one of those moments occurred and fired me up for those coming through.

With my already agitated behavior and new monsters to keep me company for just the night, I was far from that awkward first night before and just ready to hear some laughter and screams. New quirks for the scene were tested and I would say they are quite successful. Much more comfortable. Almost too comfortable. Sometimes, I get a tiny bit carried away. My body gets ahead of my mind and I forget where I am. I fell tonight. I got slapped 3 or 4 times. I jammed my knee into the wagon a few times. To be fair, it was a wet night!

The rain never affected the house much last year as it does the hayride, and I learned how much the weather affects the hayride after tonight. Rain can put a damper on these nights, turning all of that dirt in the woods to sticky mud, causing for less activity all around. That being said, it was an early Saturday night for us hayride folk. Out of the farm by 11! And probably the last early Saturday night for the season.

I made a trip to Wawa afterwards. In my full costume and makeup. It's amazing how some people will see something completely ridiculous and not bother to ask about it; they kind of just brush it off as if nothing is ridiculous anymore. Out of 10 or 15 people in the store, two people asked me what my persona was about or complimented me. It just surprised me a little that people let a silly hillbilly just walk by without bothering to ask, um, excuse me, what's up with your face, or even notice this strange stranger whatsoever. What else can people get away with today? I kinda want to find out!

Very pleased with tonight and excited for the rest of the season :)

(End of 2nd evening).

First Night. Awkward.

First times are always awkward; no matter the time, the place, the happening. Tonight was no different.

It was my first night out on the Hayride. The rain started falling during the first hour, making for a slow beginning. But I am lucky to have great people to keep me company on these crawling nights. And once it started picking up, the brain started functioning and the words started forming. Still very uncomfortable, but I've got some ideas.

A taste of the air tonight. My fellow monster, Colin, got on the wagon and hopped around like a dog, but no one on the wagon itself reacted at all. No scream. No laughter. No nothing. Just blank looks. And a very awkward sensation for my bud, the king of awkward. Later, I had attempted to run behind the wagon, but slipped on a rock, right in front of a critical teenager. I made for a very hasty getaway from the ambiance of the night.

I am typically fine with awkward moments. However, the Weather Channel came through tonight for a segment for their special on haunted attractions to be shown through the course of this month. And I wanna look good! But I can't if I don't even know who I am. For any sort of acting, you need time to delve into your character and really feel what they would feel and think what they would think, so that way, improvisation is more natural and easier.

All in all, tonight was awkward, and as it should feel. And no worries! Listened to the perfect Halloween-inducing music stylings of Man Man on the ride home with the taste of pumpkin spice filling my used and abused throat, waiting for another night to come so I can redeem my self.

P.S. I'm gonna try to take pictures before the night begins because a lot of this washed off from tonight and the makeup is phenomenal.

(End of 1st evening).

Overalls?!

Today snuck up on me, I'll have to admit. I didn't realize it was opening night at Bates until I was about 2 hours away from call time. But I had one issue to resolve before arrival. Overalls. I still did not have overalls!

WHERE THE HECK DO YOU GET OVERALLS?!

First place to check is always your mother's closet. Moms always have to have overalls. Right? So I called Mama and she said what?! no, son, why would I own a pair of overalls? So I was back to

WHERE THE HECK DO YOU GET OVERALLS?!

Your local department store? That's where I went and to much dismay, I left with the same

WHERE THE HECK DO YOU GET OVERALLS?!

I took my chances and drove to the mall right before my call time. Mama had suggested Sears. "They have work stuff. Dickie's and boots. You should be able to find overalls." So I walked and walked and stalked every pair of denim in the store until finally, right next to the jumpsuits, tucked back into the corner... a few straggling overalls! Weehoo! Yet upon further investigation, the smallest waist was a 40. And I'm a 30, flirting with a 29. Not weehoo. Well I tried them on and I looked a fool, but I bought them anyways (through a very fashionable, well-dressed man who did not know overalls still existed and was displeased with this fact and shook his head at mine. "I need them for work. Oh ok..."). I arrive on time, with all my preparations and ask the costume department for some string, so I can tie the back of my overalls, so it looks slightly less atrocious. "Oh, we have smaller overalls over here. Try one of them!"

Well damn.